A Generational Look at Feminism- Week 2

I chose to interview my mom. She is an over 45 woman who has a very successful career as the President and publisher of a business newspaper. The company puts on an event each fall that honors "50 Women Making a Difference." It is called The Woman of the Year. She has also been a supporter of women in business, and has always been a supporter of mine. She believes that I can truly do anything that I want to do. The only person that would stop me would be me. When asked what her experience with gender has been, she said this:
"Growing up, I had a mother who had a traditional female role of homemaker, but my also parents told me that I could do anything that I wanted to do. Though I’m not sure they believed it, I did. I didn’t go through life thinking that I needed to find a man to take care of me. When my parents got divorced it really showed me that it’s not smart to depend on a man take care of you. Both of these things combined made me know that I would have a career. I broke through a glass ceiling in a way because I have a leadership position in a male dominated field. Though I don’t always think of it this way- I am just doing what I want to do."
When asked what her history with feminism is, she said this:
"I was really inspired in college by a few Women’s Studies classes. As I’ve gone through adulthood I’ve made it an important part of my life to build and support women leaders. And until we are equal in business, government, we have to keep talking about it and finding ways to build women up. But I’m careful of the word feminism. I think I’ve found that I can get the same results in building women up without calling myself a feminist just because it has such a stigma that began in the 60s. In a way we have to play the game, but that doesn’t change what we have to do which is never give up. There are also a lot of enlightened men who feel the same way (though there are plenty who aren’t, and I just ignore them). You can’t go through life angry and bitter- you just have to go for it. You would never get anything done if you only think about what you can’t do."
She also said that many times men will ask her why they don't have a Man of the Year. She said that sometimes she can just give them a look that makes them shut up, but other times she gives them the statistics. The statistics of men versus women on corporate boards or who hold public office. While women have made great strides, it is still not equal.

My definition of feminism is different from hers. Though I do see the stigma that the word carries, that does not make me not want to call myself a feminist. I think that feminists are people who want equality for men and women in the workplace. They are people who want the stereotypical gender roles to be erased.

I don't think I have ever been held back because of my gender. I feel that my opportunities to get an education and find work have been equal to my male counterparts- so far anyway. Because I am in a sorority, there is no competition between men and women for leadership positions. I am fortunate in that I can hold the position of Vice President. And I also am surrounded by women who are also interested in leadership positions, graduate school, and taking a chip out of the glass ceiling in whatever field they may be studying.

Honestly, the only time that I am conscious of my gender is when I am doing something as trivial as getting my oil changed. The mechanics are all men, and they usually talk to me like I have clue about getting my oil changed. And while I may not know much about cars, I am more than capable of letting them know what I need. I think that I am very fortunate that events like these are what make me most conscious of gender.

I find The F Word fascinating. I think the book deals with issues that are important in girls' and women's lives today. Chapter 3 deals with sex, sex education, and access to birth control. I came from a very conservative high school- sex wasn't even mentioned in health class. We had a STD session at the very end of my senior year, but by this time most everyone had already had sex. I don't believe that abstinence only education is going to stop someone from having sex. Showing pictures of STDs in the eighth grade might, but there was a girl in my eighth grade class who was pregnant. Schools, and the government, should decide that teaching teenagers about safe sex and providing a school nurse and counselors who will listen is more effective in decreasing the rate of teen pregnancies and teen abortions.

In Chapter 5, I found it interesting that they blamed the Third Wave's focus on the individual for the fragmentation and lack of focus of feminism today. I would agree though. I believe that the scope is too broad- we still don't have fair pay. Feminists should focus on equal rights first. Sometimes it is more effective to have a brilliant argument than to go for shock and awe as I feel many third wavers do. I believe that America now has a President who will do a lot for equality- just last week he signed an equal pay bill, one that Lilly Ledbetter had been fighting for for years. Let us take advantage of this. Let us work toward a tangible goal.

In bell hooks' Feminism is for Everybody, Chapter 11 really stood out. I am also currently taking Women in the Military. We have explored violence and violence against women in relation to warfare. The interesting comparison that was made was that warriors feminize their enemies, so by fighting them it is like they are raping them. War is a patriarchy. War is essentially males dominating females. But we also heard from a zoology professor, that though males do produce more testosterone than females, it is not significant enough to explain their aggressiveness. Females can be aggressive too. It is more how men are socialized. They are taught from a very young age how men "should act." Until this can stop, until men can be better educated, I am not sure that violence against women will stop.

Until next time,
Madison